Tag: gratitude

The Ongoing Challenge of Learning Contentment

On By barrysnotesLeave a comment

Of all the spiritual disciplines, I think that contentment may be the toughest to learn. The challenge is ongoing.

It isn’t that I don’t want to be content—I do. It’s that we live in a world wired to keep us restless. A consumerist economy whispers that the next upgrade, the newest version, or the latest device will finally deliver satisfaction. At the same time, my own temperament nudges me toward constant evaluation: fix what is broken, mend what is fractured, restore what has fallen apart. Those instincts aren’t wrong, but they can easily pull my soul out of rhythm.

That’s why the apostle Paul’s words feel both comforting and challenging: “I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances” (Philippians 4:11). Contentment, Paul reminds us, is something learned—not instantly acquired, not naturally absorbed, but gradually shaped through trust and practice.

G. K. Chesterton observed, “True contentment is a real, active virtue—not a passive or timid acceptance of things as they are.” His words help me remember that contentment isn’t complacency. It is the courageous decision to embrace this moment with gratitude rather than wait for the perfect one.

Many people now take pictures with their phones using filters—adjusting brightness, warmth, and contrast to create a more polished version of reality. Contentment works in the opposite direction. Instead of filtering our lives to hide imperfections, contentment allows us to see clearly, without distortion. It shifts the focus from what is missing to what is meaningful, helping us recognize beauty in what we already have.

At its core, contentment is a commitment to simplicity. It rearranges my priorities so that my mission becomes primary, and the tangible resources in my portfolio become tools rather than trophies—means rather than measurements. When I practice contentment, life no longer feels like an expanding inventory but an emerging story.

Something transformative happens in that shift. Relationships rise to the forefront, while possessions return to their rightful place. People become essential; stuff becomes expendable. My life becomes more like a conduit than a reservoir—a channel through which blessings flow freely into the lives of others, not a storage unit where blessings are archived, counted, and guarded.

To live with contentment, I must return again and again to one foundational truth: my self-worth is neither inflated nor deflated by my net worth. My value does not hinge on what I own, what I accomplish, or what others think of me. My identity is rooted in something deeper and more enduring—worth that was instilled and endowed by my Creator.

Contentment, then, is not resignation. It is not passive acceptance. It is the steady confidence that God’s grace is sufficient in this moment, this season, this chapter—whatever it may hold. It is the quiet courage to trust that I already have what I need to live gratefully and faithfully today.

I’m still learning this discipline. Perhaps you are, too. But each day offers a new lesson, a fresh reminder, and a renewed opportunity to loosen our grip on accumulation and tighten our embrace of gratitude.

Gratitude Can Upgrade Your Attitude

On By barrysnotesLeave a comment

Do you need an attitude adjustment? As we navigate the uncertainty and anxiety of living in a polarized culture, it is possible for our attitude to get so significantly out of alignment with our faith and values that we need more than an attitude adjustment. We may need an extreme makeover.

Gratitude is more than a polite habit or a holiday theme—it is a transformative force that recalibrates the way we see the world. As the poet Ralph Waldo Emerson once wrote, “Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and give thanks continuously.” Gratitude doesn’t just decorate life; it upgrades it.

Think about the way our smart devices regularly ask for software updates. Whether we accept them or avoid them, those updates are designed to stabilize the system, fix hidden issues, and improve overall performance. In a similar way, practicing gratitude is like installing an internal “attitude update.” It doesn’t change all our circumstances, but it changes the way we engage them. Gratitude strengthens the emotional operating system that carries us through the day.

During the dark winter at Valley Forge in 1777, General George Washington encouraged his weary troops not simply by calling them to endure hardship, but by helping them reflect on what they were fighting for. That shift—from hardship to meaning—sparked renewed resolve. Gratitude for a higher purpose sustained them when supplies were limited and conditions were brutal. Their circumstances didn’t change overnight, but their attitude toward them did.

Modern psychology confirms what wisdom and faith traditions have taught for centuries. In his groundbreaking research at the University of California–Davis, Dr. Robert Emmons found that individuals who practice gratitude—especially through habits like journaling—experience noticeable emotional, physical, and relational benefits. Participants who regularly reflected on what they were thankful for reported fewer illness symptoms, increased optimism, stronger immune responses, and greater overall life satisfaction. Gratitude, in other words, literally upgrades the mind and body.

Gratitude can totally reshape our attitude.

Even in the daily grind, we see gratitude driving resilience. A young professional recently shared how her morning practice of listing three things she was thankful for—even on difficult days—helped her push through burnout, manage workplace stress, and regain clarity in her relationships. She said, “I didn’t change my job. Gratitude changed me.”

Gratitude does not deny hardships, erase grief, or eliminate challenges. But it reframes our experience of them. It shifts our focus from what is missing to what is present, from scarcity to abundance, from complaint to contentment. And over time, it transforms us—quietly, steadily, faithfully—from the inside out.

With good reason, Scripture encourages us to “give thanks in all circumstances.” Gratitude is not merely a mood. It is a spiritual discipline, a psychological booster, and a daily choice that enriches our lives far beyond the holiday table.

When we practice gratitude consistently, we don’t just feel better—we become better. A more enjoyable friend. A more appreciated colleague. A more pleasant neighbor. A better human being.

Years ago, at a Baptist Student Union event, minister and humorist, Grady Nutt, challenged us to live with “an attitude of gratitude.” At that time, I began to see the correlation between attitude and gratitude.

Now, across several years of serving as a pastor, I have observed firsthand the transformative impact of gratitude.

Is your attitude due for an upgrade?

Resounding Gratitude: A Reflection on Psalm 138

On By barrysnotesLeave a comment

Phoebe Birkhimer, a beloved church member and neighbor of ours during our years serving at the First Baptist Church of Williams, was known for her avid and personal note-writing. In 1992 when I had knee surgery, Phoebe baked cookies and sent them to our home as I was recovering. As an expression of gratitude, I sent hand-written notes to all who had provided food and flowers during my recuperation, including Phoebe. A few days later it happened…I received a “thank you” from Phoebe for the “thank you” note I had sent to her. Now that’s a lot of gratitude!

Psalm 138 is a song of praise and gratitude attributed to David. In The Message, “thanks” or “thank you” occurs six times. That’s a lot of gratitude. This resounds as a chorus of appreciation for God’s love, faithfulness, and strength. Then the psalmist proceeds to thank God for what God has done and for what God is going to do.

This psalm is a reminder that our relationship with God should be marked by gratitude and appreciation for God’s character and God’s actions on our behalf.

In seasons of trial or uncertainty, gratitude can be difficult, but it tends to be life-shaping in all kinds of circumstances.  When we shift our focus from our predicaments to God’s faithfulness, our hearts are infused with hope and courage. David’s experience reminds us that even when the path ahead seems daunting, God walks with us, providing the grace and strength we need to confront each challenge.

Take time to lift your voice in praise and gratitude to God. Alice Walker, author of The Color Purple, says, “’Thank you’ is the best prayer that anyone could say. I say that one a lot. Thank you expresses extreme gratitude, humility, understanding.”

A deeper dive…What are some specific things you want to thank God for? How has God shown steadfast love and faithfulness in your life?

Prayer for today… Thank you, O God, for your goodness and faithfulness in my life. I am grateful for your love, mercy, and grace that strengthen me on my journey. Thank you for hearing my prayers, guiding my steps, and providing for my needs. Now cultivate in me a heart of gratitude as I grow to trust you more. Amen.

(Barry Howard is a retired pastor who now serves as a leadership coach and consultant with the Center for Healthy Churches. He and his wife live on Cove Lake in northeast Alabama.)

(A version of this devotional was first published in Reflections Daily Devotional Guide.)


Memorial Day: 5 Reasons Why Remembering Is Important

On By barrysnotesLeave a comment

Memorial Day is more than a three-day weekend or the unofficial start of summer. It’s a sacred invitation to pause, reflect, and remember. In a culture that moves at the speed of a scrolling screen, practicing the discipline of remembering has become both countercultural and essential.

This day, set aside to honor those who have given their lives in service to our country, invites us into something deeper than nostalgia. It calls us to gratitude and beckons us to learn from the past.

When we fail to remember the sacrifices of those who came before us, we succumb to a convenient amnesia that gradually robs us of the freedoms we cherish. To fail to remember creates a contagious apathy that leads to a neglect of both our responsibility and our citizenship. To fail to remember can produce a false sense of security and an inaccurate perception that we are exempt from dictatorship and autocracy. If for no other reason, we should remember in order to guard against what George Washington called “the impostures of pretended patriotism.”

As we observe Memorial Day, here are five reflections about the importance of remembering:

  • Remembering is a sacred act. Throughout Scripture, God’s people are called to remember. “Remember the wonders He has done,” the psalmist writes (Psalm 105:5). Jesus, at the Last Supper, told his disciples, “Do this in remembrance of me.” Remembering anchors us. It shapes our identity. It gives context to our present and guidance for our future.

  • Remembering reminds us our freedom was not free. The liberties we enjoy come at a cost. Franklin D. Roosevelt cautioned, “Those who have long enjoyed such privileges as we enjoy forget in time that men have died to win them.”  Memorial Day reminds us that peace is preserved by those willing to risk—and sometimes give—their lives. Honoring the fallen should stir in us a sense of responsibility to live in a way that upholds the values they died defending.
  • Remembering evokes both grief and gratitude. For many, Memorial Day carries deep personal loss. It’s not just a day of flags and flowers—it’s a day when grief resurfaces. And yet, gratitude finds space there too. As one veteran said, “We don’t remember them because they died. We remember them because they lived.” Their stories of courage and selflessness inspire us to live with more purpose and compassion.
  • Remembering can shape us for the better. When we take the time to remember, we grow in empathy. We honor courage. We rediscover our shared humanity. And we are reminded that our freedom, our peace, and our way of life are built on the backs of those who stood in harm’s way for the sake of others. We are also inspired to protect and preserve freedom for those who come after us.
  • Remembering prompts us to pass the memories along to the next generation. Ronald Reagan cautioned, “Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction. It must be fought for, protected, and handed on for them to do the same.” Our children and grandchildren won’t understand the meaning of Memorial Day unless we tell the stories. Visit a veterans’ cemetery, attend a memorial service, or share the history of someone in your family or community who served. Let them see remembrance in action.

This Memorial Day, let us do more than enjoy a day off. Let us pause. Let us give thanks. Let us reflect on the cost of the liberties we enjoy. Let us teach our children the stories of valor and sacrifice. And let us recommit ourselves to building a world worthy of the lives that were given.

John F. Kennedy insisted, “As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.”

Kennedy’s words seem even more relevant today. It’s not enough to say thank you—we must live in a way that honors the gift. Memorial Day challenges us to turn remembrance into action: by serving others, standing up for justice, and living with integrity.

(Barry Howard is a retired pastor who currently serves as a leadership coach and consultant with the Center for Healthy Churches. He and his wife reside on Cove Lake in northeast Alabama.)

Life Is Short: 7 Reasons to Receive Each Day As a Gift

On By barrysnotesLeave a comment

The famous evangelist Billy Graham confessed, “The greatest surprise in life to me is the brevity of life.”

We’ve all heard the phrase, “Life is short.” It’s often said in passing—when we lose someone too soon, when a moment takes our breath away, or when we’re reminded how fast the years fly by. But what if we took that phrase to heart? What if we allowed it to shape the way we think, speak, love, serve, and live?

Here are seven reasons to live each day as a sacred and fleeting gift:

1. Time is a non-renewable resource.

Unlike money, time cannot be earned back or saved up. Every sunrise is a once-in-a-lifetime event. Each conversation, each quiet moment, each new opportunity is here now—and may never come again.

2. Today presents opportunities to grow.

Each day brings lessons, challenges, and opportunities for growth. We’re not the same people we were yesterday. Receive today as a gradual and progressive step forward in your becoming—a place where faith can deepen and character can stretch.

3. Lighten the load someone else is carrying.

When we live with compassion and kindness, we become part of someone else’s healing. A smile, a kind gesture, or an encouraging word may seem ordinary to you but can be life-giving to someone else. Phillips Brooks urged, “Be patient and understanding. Life is too short to be vengeful or malicious.”

4. Joy is often hidden in the present moment.

When we stop chasing “someday” and start noticing “today,” we discover beauty in the now. The warmth of coffee, the sound of laughter, the beauty of a landscape, the encouragement of a friend—these are the moments that quietly nourish the soul.

5. Gratitude changes our perspective.

When we live with the mindset that each day is a gift, we begin to see more gifts in our days. Gratitude doesn’t change our circumstances—it transforms our perspective. And that shift is powerful.

6. Regret is too heavy to lug around.

The weight of “I wish I had…” can be heavy. But when we live intentionally—speaking our hearts, showing up for others, and taking courageous steps—we reduce the space for regret and make room for peace.

7. Today is the only day you are promised.

Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed. All we truly have is today—this moment, this breath, this chance. Don’t wait for all the stars to align in your favor to start living fully. Begin now.

Annie Dillard reminds us, “How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.”

Life is short—a sacred breath between dust and eternity. So love deeply, forgive freely, walk humbly, and live each day as a precious gift not to be wasted.

Let’s not just say life is short—let’s embrace today and live life to the fullest.

Life Is Short: 7 Reasons to Receive Each Day As a Gift

On By barrysnotesLeave a comment

The famous evangelist Billy Graham confessed, “The greatest surprise in life to me is the brevity of life.”

We’ve all heard the phrase, “Life is short.” It’s often said in passing—when we lose someone too soon, when a moment takes our breath away, or when we’re reminded how fast the years fly by. But what if we took that phrase to heart? What if we allowed it to shape the way we think, speak, love, serve, and live?

Here are seven reasons to live each day as a sacred, unrepeatable gift:

1. Time is a non-renewable resource.

Unlike money, time cannot be earned back or saved up. Every sunrise is a once-in-a-lifetime event. Each conversation, each quiet moment, each new opportunity is here now—and may never come again.

2. Today presents opportunities to grow.

Each day brings lessons, challenges, and opportunities for growth. We’re not the same people we were yesterday. Receive today as a gradual and progressive step forward in your becoming—a place where faith can deepen and character can stretch.

3. Lighten the load someone else is carrying.

When we live with compassion and kindness, we become part of someone else’s healing. A smile, a kind gesture, or an encouraging word may seem ordinary to you but can be life-giving to someone else. Phillips Brooks urged, “Be patient and understanding. Life is too short to be vengeful or malicious.”

4. Joy is often hidden in the present.

When we stop chasing “someday” and start noticing “today,” we discover beauty in the now. The warmth of coffee, the sound of laughter, the kindness of a friend—these are the moments that quietly nourish the soul.

5. Gratitude changes our perspective.

When we live with the mindset that each day is a gift, we begin to see more gifts in our days. Gratitude doesn’t change our circumstances—it transforms our perspective. And that shift is powerful.

6. Regret is too heavy to lug around.

The weight of “I wish I had…” can be heavy. But when we live intentionally—speaking our hearts, showing up for others, and taking courageous steps—we reduce the space for regret and make room for peace.

7. Today is the only day you are promised.

Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed. All we truly have is today—this moment, this breath, this chance. Don’t wait for all the stars to align in your favor to start living fully. Begin now.

Annie Dillard reminds us, “How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.”

Life is short—a sacred breath between dust and eternity. So love deeply, forgive freely, walk humbly, and live each day as a precious gift not to be wasted.

Let’s not just say life is short—let’s live like it.

10 Benefits of Showing Kindness

On By barrysnotesLeave a comment

Fred Rogers proposed, “Being kind means responding to the needs of others—and people can be kind, no matter how old or young we are.”

As we navigate our daily lives, it’s easy to overlook the profound impact that simple acts of kindness can have. The Bible encourages us to “be kind and compassionate to one another” (Ephesians 4:32), highlighting the importance of this virtue.

Here are ten benefits of kindness that illustrated how kindness can transform our lives and the lives of those around us:

1. Kindness builds and strengthens relationships. When we show kindness to others, it fosters trust, understanding, and mutual respect. These acts create a foundation for deeper, more meaningful connections with family, friends, and even strangers.

2. Kindness improves our mental health. Engaging in acts of kindness has been shown to reduce stress, anxiety, and depression. Performing kind deeds releases endorphins, the brain’s natural painkillers, and serotonin, the feel-good chemical. This helps improve our overall mood and mental well-being.

3. Kindness is good for our physical health too. Studies have found that people who practice kindness have lower blood pressure and reduced levels of cortisol, a stress hormone. This can lead to a healthier heart and a stronger immune system.

4. Kindness cultivates a positive community. Kindness is contagious. When we act kindly, it inspires others to do the same, creating a ripple effect that can transform communities. A culture of kindness promotes cooperation, reduces conflicts, and enhances the overall quality of life.

5. Acts of kindness can significantly boost our happiness. When we help others, it activates areas of the brain associated with pleasure, social connection, and trust. This “helper’s high” leaves us feeling more joyful and fulfilled.

6. Practicing kindness helps us develop empathy and compassion. By putting ourselves in others’ shoes and understanding their feelings and needs, we become more attuned to the struggles and joys of those around us, fostering a more compassionate outlook on life.

7. Kindness can help us cultivate gratitude. When we focus on helping others and being kind, we become more aware of the blessings in our own lives. This perspective shift helps us appreciate what we have and fosters a spirit of thankfulness.

8. Kindness strengthens our faith. Showing kindness aligns with God’s commandments and Jesus’ teachings. By living out kindness, we strengthen our faith and reflect God’s love to those around us. It is a powerful testimony to God’s presence in our lives.

9. Kindness enhances our self-worth and sense of purpose. Knowing that we have made a positive impact on someone else’s life boosts our confidence and reinforces our value as individuals.

10. Acts of kindness make a lasting impact. The kindness we show today can have a ripple effect that lasts far beyond our lifetimes. It creates a legacy of love and compassion that can inspire future generations to continue the practice of kindness.

Many years ago Mark Twain quipped, “Kindness is a language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.”

In a world that often feels divided and tumultuous, kindness is a powerful tool for creating positive change. This week be sure to show a little kindness in your daily interactions, knowing that these simple acts can transform our lives and the lives of others in profound ways.