For those of us who grew up watching Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, the Island of Misfit Toys has become a symbol of being different, overlooked, or left out. Although the toys were not broken, they were misunderstood and longing for a place where they belonged.

For many individuals, the holidays can feel like that island—a season where everyone else seems to have a place, a purpose, and people to share it with, while loneliness leaves us feeling adrift. In a recent Harvard study, 21 percent of adults indicated they have experienced serious feelings of loneliness.

If you’re feeling like life on the “island” is your reality this Christmas, take heart. Loneliness, though difficult, does not have the final word. Here are some ways to find meaning, connection, and even joy during the holidays, no matter your circumstances:

1. Own your uniqueness. On Rudolph’s journey, Charlie-in-the-Box insisted, “Being a misfit means that you are special. Embrace your uniqueness and celebrate who you are.” Loneliness can stem from feeling out of place or like you don’t measure up to others’ holiday experiences. But the beauty of Christmas is that God didn’t choose perfection to carry out his plan. God chose a humble manger, ordinary shepherds, and a small, overlooked town. Lean into who you are, and remember that you are uniquely and wonderfully made.

2. Come to terms with your feelings. It’s okay to admit that the holidays are hard. Whether you’re grieving a loss, facing a season of change, or simply feeling the ache of solitude, naming those emotions can be a powerful first step toward healing. Even Jesus experienced loneliness and sorrow. He knows your pain and he is near to you, offering comfort and peace.

3. Look for fellow “misfits.” The Misfit Toys didn’t stay isolated. They found each other. Seek out others who may also feel disconnected during this season. Attend a community event, reach out to a friend, or visit a local church. Many people long for connection but don’t know how to take the first step. Your initiative could be a gift not only to you but to someone else.

4. Find joy in serving. One of the most powerful antidotes to loneliness is serving others. Volunteer at a shelter, bake cookies for your neighbors, or send handwritten notes to people who might also be feeling alone. When we shift our focus outward, we often discover new connections and purpose in the process.

5. Lean into the Christmas story. At its core, Christmas is not about parties, gifts, or picture-perfect moments. The Christmas story is about God stepping into our messy, lonely world to be with us. The birth of Christ is a profound reminder that we are never truly alone. Emmanuel, “God with us,” means God is present in your quiet moments, your tears, your laughter, your challenges, and your joys.

6. Create your own traditions. If old traditions bring more pain than joy, don’t be afraid to start new ones. Hermey the Elf advises, “Follow your passion and dreams, even if they don’t fit into the mold. Be true to yourself and find joy in pursuing what you love.” Write a poem, start a jigsaw puzzle, try the new recipe, dance by the light of the tree, or take a peaceful walk under the stars. Simple, meaningful actions can help you reclaim the season.

7. Give yourself the gift of grace. It’s okay to feel lonely, and it’s normal to experience melancholy during the holidays. Don’t be too hard on yourself if your emotions feel a little chaotic. The first Christmas night wasn’t filled with jubilant celebration but with quiet humility. Let yourself rest in the peace of the season, know that your self-worth isn’t determined by how festive you feel.

The story of the Misfit Toys didn’t end with them being forgotten. Rudolph and his friends ensured they were found, loved, and given purpose. Christmas is a reminder that we are never truly left behind. God sees us, loves us, and has a purpose for us—even when at times we feel like misfits.

Dare to step outside your comfort zone this Christmas. As Yukon Cornelius wisely observes, “Adventure awaits those who are willing to take risks. Embrace the unknown and discover the wonders of the world.”

(Barry Howard is a retired pastor who serves as a leadership coach and columnist with the Center for Healthy Churches. He and his wife reside on Cove Creek in northeast Alabama.)